Do You Fit In?

Steve and I became Christians sometime in the mid 80's. Don't ask for a date; it was a gradual, stumbling process. Thank God (and I mean that personally) belief came to both of us around the same time, because it would have a been a difficult marriage otherwise. Today we're both committed to Him. If you know us, you already know that.

Today is not the time for the story of why we left our church last year, other than to say we didn't "fit in." You know, we're not Republicans, we do drink wine or beer, we see movies, we didn't home school or send our kids to religious schools, and other sundry things that are not important to us, but are to some "Christians." We've never tried to alter who we are to fit in anywhere. If I'd lived with Christ, I'm pretty sure He'd have loved me as I am, even though I don't fit the current "Christian" mold.

So, some 24 years after accepting Christ, we have not yet found a new church home. Oh, we go to a local one and the pastor is great. Really great. But it's not yet our home. The place is casual, the sermons are great, the people are friendly. Yet because my children and I were wounded so deeply at the other place for not being who they thought we should be, I am "gun shy" so to speak. I'm not ready to open my heart to others, not even Believers, so we'll just visit for awhile.

And that's not a bad thing. I'm realizing I don't need to belong, as long as I believe. Where does it say that someone who loves the Lord has to go to church every week? All I'm called to do is to love Him, and I do, passionately. For now we'll continue to disdain most conservative news media, we'll watch R rated movies if they look good and not offensive, and if you must know, we'll continue to watch Glee, starring two gay actors whom I absolutely adore.

And by adore, I mean if the young man was my son, I'd love him completely and if the woman was my sister, I'd be happy she was. This story is amazingly honest and insightful and I wish Christians were forced to watch it in Sunday School. I have no energy or room in my sinful life to hate anyone who is not just like me. Do you?